Everyone deserves.

Over the yoga workshop i was attending during this trip, the teacher mentioned
" Everyone wants happiness, and everyone deserves to be happy." 

Which is not untrue at all!

Ask any one who succumbed to yoga practice, after trying all sorts of other methods trying to find the point of being happy; everyone who enter the yoga room, with an intention to travel to a spot of comfort-ness, an intention to be happy and a state of blissfulness.

Many people may walked out of the practice room carrying couple of muscles aches ( that may last for days even!); but i'm sure, they will be glowing from the inside ( an feeling of unknown joy) smiling.
While we are busying searching for the things that we want to depend on to me a happier being, yoga practice tells us " its already here". We are sort of blind in some way.

In the journey of entering into the yoga world, we starts to uncover many "ugly" issues of ourselves. Be it, the unexpected conditions of our flesh or the turbulences of emotion we are trying to manage daily; we learn how to love all of them as well; because it part of us.

We need to appreciate ourselves, that includes our flaws too! 
Many times, we tend to put ourselves down by comparing our flaws with others. But come to think of it, who doesn't have flaws? We just have different flaws.

The workshop was physically challenging, which forced us to really keep our focus tight enough to keep moving forward. Anyone could have just throw a white flag and walk out of the class, but no one did.
While the tough got tougher, students in the room started to talk about how their bodies or inexperience of practice years hasn't been helpful for certain movements or poses.
Which by talking more of these, would eventually pull down their own morale.

The teacher ( Ajay) emphasized on the point that everyone has to accept and love whatever bodily conditions their parents gave them. No matter what, we are beautiful in our own way. Our body is a machines that we need it to operate our task, that's why its important for us to maintain it properly for better function.

To any teachers, achieving the final pose is never the most important task. The sturdy foundation has to be there, and constant progression of hard work are what matter. Everyone is different, some people starts early, some late; it doesn't matter at all... so long as we started doing something now. Now.

A sharp mind has a clear vision, sees little but reality truth. 
A mind clouded by perceptions, see a lot, but deluded tricks. 

Don't take advantage of yourself!

Have you been traveling alone before? If not, try it!

I'm on a impromptu loner traveling to Bangkok this week; everything just sort of fell into place nicely!

Got a good deal for the air ticket, a long weekend holiday ( vesak day) & a teacher is traveling to Bangkok for workshop ( just the same week as i am)!

Is it lonely to be traveling alone? Actually no.

Phew! Never a time i feel that i'm bored, the simplest thing can be as interesting too!
Enjoying every bit of my time, things becomes more interesting & busy checking out the streets.
I got some time to do some reading, spacing out, catching my sleep without the alarm or not checking out the time.

And maybe just thinking about anything. Which i didn't really have the luxury to do that if i'm on schedule for teaching.
In this trip, learn something: Don't take advantage of yourself.

In the days that we are busy, really busy with our daily work or household stuff; we could zig zag between fully into the routine or operating like a robot. Our head will be running in full force of information without rest.

Don't ever feel guilty for taking time off from your work ( i know many people do, or at least your colleagues try to make you feel guilty from leaving the work space); and spending sometimes for yourself.
Thank yourself for working hard, appreciate your own effort given and let it space out for few days.
You'll be surprise that you can operate better after that!


It has been interesting so far, i did go lost a few time, managing to get into the place i want to.
I'm more independent for checking out the direction ( my friends had spoilt me thoroughly for their good sense of direction!)

Learning how to ask for help, is the best thing ever. Once, in the supermarket, i wasn't tall enough to reach for the item i wanted; a thai man happened to walked by ( he wasn't that tall either), i asked him for help. He jumped and got it for me, really thankful for the gesture!

This trip open a chance for me to create my own space again, a time to appreciate myself for who i am, before i got lost into who i wish to be. 

Being too comfortable in modification, leads to complacency.

As the other opposite end of an impatient practice ( i mentioned in the previous pos), is being too comfortable in modifications ( unless there are injuries).

While there are some poses looks like a twisted donut, and others looks simply like a folded book. Each person has their own room for improvements.
When facing challenges from our physical condition ( tight muscles, stiff joints or lack of strength), we can start off with the modified version of the end result.

But, when we start to set into the comfort zone of the modification, we become stagnant.
We become too laid back with the practice, and the mind will be lazy & lethargic.
This is not good.

Because, this physical pattern will then tell your mind to live in just the area of your own limitation. And we lock ourselves in mentally to our own little world. We will forget there's still the possibilities for miracles, for freedom in the open minded sky.

When handling a modification, we need to maintain a strong & focus mind to keep moving closer to the actual pose. Then our mind will become stronger, and our physical becomes more stable. Its not about reaching the targeted pose, its about doing more for yourself to be better.

Know what you are doing now is going to bring you somewhere, not no-where. 

Important to practice with a teacher?

I met this student, who was just making a short visit to Singapore; we managed to have 2 classes before we parted. And it was one of the interesting session i'd with her.
It so happened that she wanted to do Ashtanga, and i happened to be teaching it too!

Sometimes i questioned myself, " Do i really need to practice with a teacher? When i can do my own self practice at home?"
Yes, at some level, i do need a teacher to lead me forward.

During the practice with this student, i pointed out some changes of habits in her practice; or even broken down the posture with a chunk of explanation, so that she understand the whole idea of some complicated poses.

Mentally, she understood me. But hands- on, physically the same old pattern was still happening.
I remembered i sat beside her, and repeatedly correcting her physically to check out her own blind- spot in the practice. She did it !

We had a discussion about not having to rush into any complicated pose, unless the foundation is properly done. When things becomes too complicated, we can't spot the root of the problem. Keep it simple, one step at a time & make it right.
Impatience in the practice will surely lead to injury. And being patience becomes the toughest practice of all.

Which in turn a recollection of my questions that my purpose of practicing with teacher, is still essential to me. Because i realized i can't see my own blind spot, that's pulling me back from going forward.
There are always some area in us that we can keep making small effort to be better.

The presence of a sharped- minded teacher is truly a blessing to the student.
Sometimes when we clouded by doubts for the beliefs in our own incapability, a teacher is there to show us how to flip the situation over.

There are so many ways to do a thing, keeping an open mind to the teacher who willingly share their experiences & methods; no harm trying it, it may just work!

Repeated mistakes are mistakes. New mistakes are lessons.

As the yoga sutra mentioned sthira suhkam asanam ( steady & at ease in a position).

That's what we has always been working towards to, be at ease. But what's next?

Recently, i didn't feel too much of sukam; rather more discomforts and a whirlpool of emotions stirring inside. Most of the time, i just feel a gush of anger. No, i'm not angry with anything or anyone, the feeling just arises almost caught me at a loss of what was actually happening to me.

Once, my practice came to a point where i was pretty comfortable with; as my physical body was able to manage the practice almost smoothly. Which i almost fell into the area of being too comfortable, or rather, complacent.

My practice got a little bit more intense than before, as more new poses are introduced from the teacher;

which as means that i'm exploring into unfamiliar grounds. The discipline of the series does not allow the practitioner to pick whatever pose that we like to practice on; by having to follow the sequence, i can't avoid difficult situation, but to face it.

More effort, more struggles, more body aches, more falls and more attempts is pushing myself to maximize my boundary. 

Emotions arises, emotions that triggers past memories arises too. I didn't really like it, not too sure when did it creep  back into my mind again. 

Past memories just surface up whenever they like to, so does fear and anger. 

While busy struggling with my physical practices, overcoming myself for the many attempts to continue; the negative emotions are not helping me to feel any better, but worse.

There will be some point that when the recollections showed up, i felt so upset inside, at a loss of how i should handle it. Suddenly, every fibre of my muscles started to fall apart, and i could not muster any strength to move on at all. 

I even almost wanted to give it all up, slumber down on my mat and cry out loud. Phew! I didn't.

Somehow every time i manage to pull my focus back and kept reminding myself to move on. 

Pull back very muscles fibre and be stronger. 

James mentioned " Makes different mistakes.  Don't keep making the same mistakes in a row and expect to get different results!"

We love making same mistakes, and we do get comfortable making the same mistakes, out of fear.

It sounds stupids, but its true. A mistake is a mistake, if we repeat them. A mistake is a lesson if we don't repeat them. 

That's what happened to our past memories; it kept popping up, because i did't handle it the way i should be.

Yoga practices, has the ability to dig into our old accounts of our past deeds. Whether we want to start anew fresh life or not, we can't run away from our unsettled old debts. I don't like it, but i'm not running or avoiding from it. 

I'm willing  to work hard to handle every bad debts that i've accrued.

So, does practicing yoga actually make us more calm? 

Yes, after the crazy hard work of handling thunderstorms within us. 

Then, why work so hard to fight the thunderstorm? I don't know.

What i do know, is that there are so many question inside me, that the material world can't satisfy me.

There are so many wonderful experience i want to be in touch with that i couldn't get it from the outside. I do taste that sweetness of honey after each thunderstorm i've fought with, 

and i want more of it. 

Should i turn Left or Right? ( after corpse pose)

Should i turn to the left or right after resting in savasana ( corpse pose)?
This is one question i've been wondering for a long long time, that i read up and managed to dig out some answers that satisfy me.

Now, in turn, many students came up to me asking me the same question.
Why some teachers make us turn to the right, and some turn to the left? Which is better?
Which is the correct one?

Both are good for its own purpose. Both are correct. 
There's is always a purpose to a decision to an act. We just have to learn about it, and use it appropriately.

For my case ( i'm not too sure about other teachers though, they may have other reasons),

If i'm leading morning classes, that my intention is to make the student feels more energetic throughout the day--- i will suggest resting on the right side before getting up.
It is also suitable for people who has low BP.

If i'm taking a evening classes, with the intention to promotes calmness for the night rest--- i will suggest resting on the left side.
It is also suitable for people with high BP & during pregnancy.

A very general guideline:

Right side of our body governs the Yang ( masculine/ sun) flow of the energy in the body. Creating heat, and makes one feel energetic & active when promoted.

Left side governs the Yin ( feminine/ moon) flow of energy in the body. Promotes cooling & calming and passiveness of the body.

When looking into the a more scientific angle,

Our heart is located more on the left side of the body.

When we lie down on the right side ( which means that the ground is further from the heart) , the BP will rise slightly, due to the extra effort for the heart to pump the blood to the heart against the gravity position.

When we lie down on the left side ( means that the heart is closer to the ground), the BP will drop slightly; as we are on the side where the blood will flow down towards the heart with the gravity.
Much lesser work is needed to be done.
That is why most doctor will recommend pregnant ladies to rest on the left side ( because they get chest tightness, and chances of high BP is more than normal body condition)

* You can try using a BP machines, and check out your pressure while resting on both sides

While there's no one position is the best. Yin & Yang, Left & Right--- they operate hand in hand, interdependently.

If one do not have major medical condition, its not a big question on deciding which side to rest one.

Otherwise, do check it out with your teacher, whichever side that can better improve or manage your body condition:)

Happy resting!

Angry. So what?

I blew my top. The other day.

Not really, but i'm at the edge of blowing it off over the phone.

Honestly, i didn't like it. It did not to make me feel any better throughout the whole day.

My cheque was over-dued for weeks & the other side of the person who i was working with ( not shirly of course!) was trying to smoke me out. We had not met before, but we have business deals. 

If i had a little more space, i would have make a choice to be a LITTLE more patient.

Anger, however may be noted as a highly negative emotions, it is still living inside us.

As much as when my anger was starting to engulf me, i was very aware to let it exit somewhere out of me; and keep things as objective as possible. ( maybe i was too blunt to the person over the phone, but i ended off with a big "thank you", which i would not have done so before).

I practice detachment, i did.
Right after we ended the conversation, i stopped thinking about it, and moved on to other stuff.

Guilty? Nope.

There's nothing to be guilty about being angry, just like being happy.
Every emotion that we felt & expressed, has after effects.
Anger, did not have good after effects, because i was pretty drained out that day.
Nevertheless, it reminded me of how realistic of our present life is.

How little things that are happening daily can easily spark and stir our emotions.

Surely, yoga practices definitely has not make me lost my ability to feel happy, sad or angry.
The practice has been teaching me to manage my boundaries, and fast- recovery from the shakes of sentimental.

Many people hold an impressions that people who are involve in any yoga practices ( especially yoga teachers), are "suppose" to be kind, loving, tender, calm & cool. 
But we are not pushovers.
Definitely not your best choice to mess with. 
Yes, we can better manage than we were before; but we are managing our struggles in life just like everyone.

As much as i try to keep my own boundary clean, i respect yours too.
If you step over me with your dirty shoes, i'll pull your hair!

The Pandora Box- A box that can't close, once opened.

手不要坏， 去掀开不想看的东西！

This is one line i will remind myself harshly if i get too curious, if i keep on digging into stuff that does not lift me up, but drags me down.
Being quite a curious person, i always have more than a handful of questions, that brings me to hunt for more. The more i know, does not necessarily answer my questions. Sometime it become even questionable. After a while, i feel that this is not good, i need to know when to stop digging too much.

Have you been in situations when you so much wanted to know but yet being afraid of knowing it?
If one go ahead to find it all out, one may fall into the struggles of emotion, when we are actually not ready to comprehend it.

Here, i am not supporting the idea of " ignorance is bliss"( someone said " ignorance is bliss, till it get you") . There are knowledge we ought to be expose to; and there are informations which we shouldn't even be bothered about.

There are knowledge that triggers your desire, pulling us into traps of maya (delusions), tangling about in struggles. There are knowledge that lead us out of these commotions. How to differentiate it?

Personally, i would ask a second question.
" How is this search of curiosity going to benefit me?"

As mentioning about benefits, i'm not referring to materially/ physical  benefits, or taking some goods from the others. The benefits refers to our general well- being, at least for self- knowledge and learning;
Does acquiring this certain information makes me a wiser person? I'm i ready to accept whatever that i am going to uncover?

Wanting to know too much is not a bad thing. I would rather prefer to say that, information should be uncovered at the right time, so that it can bring us to uncover the next lesson.

Don't be too greedy to know too much. When too much information flows in at one go, one may not be able to understand and comprehend the intent message, and thus may misunderstood and act upon it in ignorance.

This post is triggered by an Art event i attended last evening. There' was this visual and sound display, where the visual effect was drawn "live" on the screen. Random strokes by the artist. It took me a while to understand what the artist was trying to do. Subtly, i made it out a box, a hand and a little girl coming out of the box. And i thought of the Pandora Box.

We all know about the concept of Pandora Box. I am the person who like to open the boxes. Later to learn that once the box is opened, it can't be closed. The tales that flows out of the box is unstoppable. While i was the one who decided to open it, sometimes i just have to force myself to accept the unacceptable. 
Being a little wiser, a little less greedy now, i do want to take more responsibility of the chosen box that i decide to open.