Ujjayi moments of Self- practice

Of all yoga practices, self-practice presents itself as the most challenging practice of all. My teacher, Master Paalu once said, " We are not talking about how much we can do, we're talking about sustainability."

For many, even myself, started self- practice with full of enthusiasm, balls of fires rolling, woke up even before the alarm ticks... and this probably last for about couple of months...only.

Boredom arises, snooze for a few minutes more after the alarm went off, washes up with closed eyes, drags myself to the mat, cursing and swearing for the stiff- stick body. Sometimes, even a little nap in sweats. Many teachers and practitioners eventually gave up the idea of doing self-practice, because it turn out to be too much of a torment. 

Self- practicing is like a farmer taking care of his crops. Everyday, he waters,  he fertilizes, he weeds, he sows... and he'll let them grow. However dry private practices it may be, i cannot deny the fact that i still enjoy moment every time. 

There were poses that was once " impossible" were made " possible" in unexpected moments during self- practices. When the left hands grabs on the right in Marichi D; when yoga shows that my chunky thighs is possible for Kumasana... a let out a whisper of victory " yes, i got it!". 

Its not about how many poses i can achieve that marks my satisfaction of the practices; rather i understand and able to self- check that the system and methodology of practice is suitable for me to keep going. The whole idea of self-practice is to be able to learn independently without the presence of external teacher. 

Many people practice for their teachers, or to please the teachers. Eventually their practice ceases when the teacher is not around anymore. There's sentence i read somewhere in a magazine: You just need to know how's your practice, and you'll know how's your life been treating you.

Practice.. practice... practice... and all is coming.

~ Sri K Patthabi Jois