08 May 2012

When practice turns topsy- turvy: Not too bad actually!

I am glad that i pulled through the 90 minutes practice today. Isn't yoga practice suppose to be smooth sailing the more we practice...hmm.. not as expected.
Just before i decided to do my practice, i read about something that triggered my past memories; which really upset me. For split second, i so wanted to call off my practice--- i unrolled the mat in the end, phew!

Was trying to stay close to the flow of my breathing, when some thoughts kept cutting that flow. Those dead memories ridiculously went on pushing my buttons--- and my initial upset turned into annoyance. I felt that burning heat building up inside my head like an inferno, and sweats was pouring like a fountain from the pores. I felt that my head was as heavy as my butt!
And finally, i paused... at Marichi C. Started to play around the towel with my fingers--- just like how a child playing with her pencil or eraser during homework time.

Two things happened. One one side, late- recollections started to crawl in--- that i suggested to myself to quickly just finished up till Navasana and end the practice.
On the other end, i remembered something i learned from a recent workshop attended by Kino Macgregor:

When many people thinks that yoga practice should be all very comfortable, nice and no pain, but no; in reality that's not what life is offering to us. The good thing is yoga practice present both--- pain( dukkha) & pleasure ( sukkha). Pains appear in our life and on our path for a reason--- for us to learn.

Not till we learn this particular lesson at this particular stage, life does not allow us to move on to the next stage. We can always keep putting off or defer them, but this in turn makes us coming back to the same problem in cycle. And pain sets in, is an opportunity for us to break this cycle.

As all these thoughts process coming to an end, i took three long breaths--- break the idea to stop halfway, and complete the series with a big shavasana ( relaxation). 
I am glad for what had happened inside me today, that i did unrolled the mat initially, that i got so distracted halfway through, and that i moved through the last half of the practice.

Life is not always as smooth sailing, so does our personal touch with yoga practices. At least, i survived a small thunderstorm today:)

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