Practicing with injuries: An expansion of knowledge.

I’ve always been grateful to the teachers who had introduced the method of Ashtanga Vinyasa method, and those who had been inspiring me to continue in such demanding practice till today.

While having a chit chat with my working partner, Shirly last week--- both of us were pouring out our concerns on our recent physical pains & injuries from the practices. Ironically, instead of shunning away from the practice altogether, we were encouraging each other how we should take a step back and modify our practice accordingly to our physical condition.

While there are 6 series in the Ashtanga Vinyasa collection, I have tasted that Primary and some bites from the Secondary.

The Primary series is a no- escape for anyone is coming into this traditional teaching. It has a name give to this full sequence as “ Yoga Chikitasa”--- means “ Yoga Therapy”.  Bashing off the idea of a slow and sweat-less session commonly seen in today’s yoga studios--- this is a very pro-active style of therapy. With the benefit of thorough physical detoxification, one couldn’t imagine how much bad stuff had been living off inside us for years.

The Primary series don’t just take 10 or 20 sessions, 1 or 2 months to“ complete”. It took me 4 years (since 2009) before i'm allowed to... or a teacher give me the first pose of the Secondary series.

Of course I was delighted, it felt like I’ve “graduated” from the Primary and moving on to the Secondary. The Second series holds a different purpose of the practice. After the body purification process from the Primary, one is then ready to face the next deeper level of purification--- Nadi Shodhana, also know as "Nerve Purification."

This nerve breaking practice can almost give me a mental breakdown. It not only involves in many deep back- bends and twists; it demands for so much strength I couldn’t have imagined.  It sways me between the sense of fear and frustration, and constant testing of my tolerance level to walk out of the room. 

Never a thought I would want to avoid or give up this series—even though I’m at a snail crawling speed. The indescribable nice effect after the practice is invaluable.

While so much chest opening movement are involved, which opens the door of our heart centre--- a very intimate place in each of us, where our emotions stay.

Like lifting the lid of the Pandora box, once the contents in the box are revealed, the fluctuation of the mind is almost unmanageable at times. However, when each layer shows up, I learnt something about myself. 

And so, finally one fine day during my exploration of this passionate series, I injured myself. The physical pain was not as bad as the guilt and self- blame that was happening inside me. It felt as if I’ve disrupted my own practice by not able to move anymore forward.

I couldn’t swallow the pride of having to retrace back to the Primary series. At first, I felt like a downgraded practice.  Still expecting my body to perform the expected level... eventually I came peace with myself and decided to listen to the crying pain of my knee.  

Ok, I’ll go back to the primary and even modify it--- after all, I was the one who landed myself in this situation.

Days ago, I would have carry the thought that our practice can only move forward. After the peaceful pact, I’ve realized that the practice is an expansion of knowledge as a whole learning tank, which I can always revisit what I’ve acquired previously as an assistant to the difficulties I’m facing at the present time.

Shirly gave a very good example (learning from her previous injures)--- it felt like someone had just pushed you down the stairs while you thought you’ve been doing well climbing almost to the top. And back down to the first step again, the frustration is not helpful at all. Being angry or sad will not bring me back to where I fell from--- why not look forward and retrace the steps up again.

This is when the mind will start to look down on the physical, blubbering unconstructive comments--- while the injured physical is still shouting like a child. I’ve learned to create space between both for wisdom to handle what’s appropriate.

And yes, my knee got so much better than I thought, whee!

Just on a side note:)

Life, its a funny game. Sometime i don't know if i'm playing the game, or i'm being played on.
The time when i feel i'm in full control--- i'm playing the game. The time when i'm knocked down--- its playing me.

Through the practice of yoga, it has sort of reveals layers and layers of issues, that i've been stuffing right at the bottom, hide it well so that i don't get to see it-- and it wouldn't affect me. But that's not so much of the case, what i didn't realize, or being sensitive to was that the practice actually makes me, locating those roots and seeds these past issues.

I was scared, very. But i didn't know how to verbalize or rationalize it in proper words. I just felt it churning in inferno inside me.

The good thing about the whole practice is, on the other hand--- i'm also given some tools and knowledge before hand to handle this up coming issues. If i were few years younger, i would have lose my grip and swirl into the mess again.

We down fall bottomlessly-- we don't. There's always a pit somewhere, and when we touch the pit.. the only way is up.

When we reached a stage where nothing make sense anymore, flip the table over. We set the rules, and they play the game. 

Quick fix--- go to pharmacy. Else, get back to your yoga mat and work it out.

Today a student was asking me for additional class for her husband, as she was worried about his high cholesterol level with the recent health report. I was quite reluctant and told her he probably has to wait till next year as i'm not taking any new slots till I'm off for my travel.

She was very concerned and trying to talk me through taking her husband. Interestingly, she noted that her husband had never willing to do yoga previously; and this time he actually requested for it but was not ready to put in more than 10 minutes of practice.

I was puzzled. So what now? Do i have to match his aloof decision of finally wanting to have a glance at this practice?

Very bluntly, i told my student that if her husband is not willing to even put one hour per day for his health, i'm not willing to put my time for him.

Her expression went crescent, and quickly change the situation by promoting how focus her husband and discipline he is. Finally, i slotted something for him; on a side note that yoga is neither a quick fix nor he should expect this practice works like Panadols.

Many students expect to resolve their 30 odd years of accumulated pains and problems in just 10 sessions of yoga. That's how crudely a student will expect from a teacher. But you know what, during that 10 sessions of yoga practice, is only the beginning for peeping into that small hole of your whole problem.

Whether you can see your own problem itself, is a problem. Many students are not ready to accept what they are facing. So, not till you are able to bring yourself to face your own trash--- we, the teachers will not be able to make you resolve anything.

Frankly, if you want a quick fix, i'll bring you to the pharmacist. But in most case, students are more familiar with the tablets & pills ( even the side effect) more than we do. Realize that those pills are not going to help us better than we help ourselves, please stay focus and patient with the practice.

I'm not as zen as what a yoga teacher should be, or expected to be. Whenever someone tries to entertain me off with " i really want to do the practice, but i can't commit my time ( one hour a week at least)."

Can't help it, inside me would rudely shout out loud, " oh shut up! you don't want to do yoga, stop entertaining me just because a yoga teacher is standing in front of you.
You have time to gossip, watch movie, shopping, cafe hopping... but not time for an hour practice. i rather you be honest with yourself. Enjoy the pain & all the best!".

Yes, that what i will be thinking at the back of my mind. The facial expression they see on me--- a blank look or a slight smile & walk away.

Someone mentioned this:

" If you have nothing nice to say, or not able to appreciate. Just keep quiet and walk away."